I have opinions. Like it or not.

Archive for November, 2007

Seinfeld

I just bought the DVD box set for a friend. Actually, we bought it together, I couldn’t possibly afford to buy the entire thing myself. 🙂 Been so excited about it. We’ve been watching it all of the two days since it’s arrived. I’m fairly certain we’ll spend the entire weekend watching it too! 🙂

I love a lot of things about Seinfeld.

  • Life, art, history, tuberculosis.
  • Art Vandelay
  • Super terrific Carpal Tunnel Syndrome
  • Fat free yogurt
  • Pez dispenser

… And many, many more such unforgettable moments. Seinfeld rocks!

P.S: I actually have a Pez Dispenser. Shaped like Donatello, from TMNT. 🙂

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Stop Honoring Gandhi?

I got a forwarded email a few days back which urged people to “stop honoring Gandhi”. It had this link in it, that basically has a whole lot of Gandhi-bashing going on. Now, I am a true-blue “youths” belonging to the new generation gang of confused youngsters. I do not know what to  believe, and what not to. However, I know for a fact, that his contribution towards dealing with our freedom struggle was really unparalleled. Maybe he made a few mistakes, some wrong decisions. But then, can we say without flinching, that his successors made the right decisions always? Or that people like Savarkar and Ghodse would have made the right decisions? Is that why our country is rolling in wealth and prosperity today?

I do not know whether the stuff on that website is true or not. However, even if we choose to ignore his actions and his valiant efforts towards getting us complete independence, do not his ideologies make even an iota of sense? Do Satyagraha and Ahinsa seem like the ravings of a madman?

I’m confused, I hope someone can shed some light. (And this isn’t a ruse to get people to comment! 😛 )

Ever wonder…?

  • why people put up relationship statuses like ‘committed’ on orkut/facebook and then expect you not to ask about it?
  • why when you do ask about it they snub you off saying ‘that’s only for my friends to know’?
  • why being civil is misunderstood as prying?
  • why the one person you expect to get support from at times like this seems to think that the ‘snubber’ was right?
  • why that one person thinks you have no reason to feel bad about being snubbed/snapped at on a public forum when all you were trying to do was be nice?

People… Ggggggaaaaahhhhhh!!!!

Oz is a strange land indeed….

Hilarious!

Chicken

Since The B is too chicken to do this tag and display it on his blog, I decided to put it up on mine.

1. How do you feel after a one night stand?

Depends on whether I manage to make it a series or not!

2. Do you ever get used to wearing a thong?

Never tried one. Thongs are only for the other two genders – females and San Franciscos.

3. Does it hurt?

You should ask this to the person who sent these questions to me. She’s lying when she says she doesn’t know – was probably too excited to figure out the answer then!

4. Do you know when you are acting crazy?

Yup. All the fuckin time.

5. Does size really matter?

Depends on which part of the anatomy you are talking about! Boobs <censored> – heck ya! Pussy <censored>- heck ya, but in reverse logic!

6. When the bill comes, are you still a feminist?

I do not subscribe to any pre-defined categories. Depends on whether I think I am going to get any that night or no!

7. Why do you take so long to get ready?

I honestly don’t know. I am, however, hopeful that I can slash it to a minute and a half from the present two.

8. Do you watch porn, too?

Why do you feel so insecure? Everyone does!!

9. Will something from Tiffany’s solve everything?

Again, too vague. Depends on who the girl is.

10. Are guys as big of a mystery to girls as they are to us?

Nope, we aren’t. When we say “Fetch me a beer”, we mean, get me a beer. We do not mean that we intend to quit drinking. When we say, “Lets do it, honey”, we do mean let us do it! We do not ask you to respond with unrelated topics such as headaches! And when we say “I love you”, we do mean that we love you! At that moment. Lack of logical ability is not our fault.

11. Why do you sometimes think you look fat?

I don’t! I am proud of my beer belly!!

12. Why are you always late?

Simply because there isn’t any utility in arriving early. Proving that the probability of arriving exactly on time is zero is trivial.

13. Does it bother you when we scratch?

You scratch??

14. Do you wish you could pee standing up?

What do you mean wish? We’ve been doing it that way for the past few millenia!! And so were you till you suddenly short-circuited!

15. Why do so many women cut their hair short as soon as they get married?

Because we convince them to! And it is not always after marriage. (Don’t ask how we manage it!) Bloody hair getting into the nose is always a problem!!

16. How often do you think about sex?

Once in a lifetime, give or take a few. It usually lasts the whole lifetime.

17. What do you think of women who sleep with guys on the first date?

Worthy of second dates!

18. Would you?

I don’t date guys. If you meant women, you really need to stop asking redundant questions!

19. Do you realize every guy wants a girl just like his mom?

Why would I care about what the other guys want in their girls so long as they aren’t eyeing mine?

20. Why does every woman think she can change him?

Neat trick, eh?

21. Does it matter what car I drive?

Nope. You are still going to cause that pile-up!

22. Do you ever fart?

Me? Fart? Nope!! Hey…. did you just fart??

Sorry about the repetitive posting, but this just had to be put up!!! 😛

A Nightmare… and the dream thereafter

What kind of a country of psychopaths do we live in?

Some answers you may not like…

Raysh tagged me again. 😛 This time, with some questions I never knew I had the answers to. But anyway, here goes!!!

1. How do you feel after a one night stand?
Relieved that it was a one-night stand and no more??!!

2. Do you ever get used to wearing a thong?
What’s there to get used to?

3. Does it hurt?
Ummm… I do not know the answer to that, sorry! 😛

4. Do you know when you are acting crazy?
Of course I do. But then that makes you angry/perplexed and it’s all worth it in the end! 😛

5. Does size really matter?
Again, I pass.

6. When the bill comes, are you still a feminist?
Only because you’re cheap enough to ask me to split it!

7. Why do you take so long to get ready?
Define long. I just do it so you can feel better about yourself, being the slob that you are.

8. Do you watch porn, too?
Nope, only women who aren’t happy with YOU do. 😛

9. Will something from Tiffany’s solve everything?
Depends on the price tag.

10. Are guys as big of a mystery to you as you are to us?
Haha. You wish!

11. Why do you sometimes think you look fat?
Because if I were skinny, I wouldn’t think that would I?

12. Why are you always late?
Why do you always arrive 2 seconds before me and then berate me for coming late?

13. Does it bother you when we scratch?
And dig your nose. And yawn with your mouth open. And sneeze/cough like you’re a cross between the Hulk and a troll. And… you get the drift.

14. Do you wish you could pee standing up?
Only so I can show you I can do anything you can.

15. Why do so many women cut their hair short as soon as they get married?
So that you don’t have a reason for not kissing my neck.

16. How often do you think about sex?
The number of times you think about it divided-by 3.

17. What do you think of women who sleep with guys on the first date?
That they’re almost as desperate as the man, which doesn’t say much about the man anyway.

18. Would you?
I have not had a proper date, let’s not get into sleeping with them ok?

19. Do you realize every guy wants a girl just like his mom?
Yeah, and it’s sick, don’t you think?

20. Why does every woman think she can change him?
Because change is inevitable. You would sooner or later change yourself, I’m just catalyzing the process. P.S: To suit my requirements. 😛

21. Does it matter what car I drive?
No. Not as long as you don’t mind stopping for directions.

22. Do you ever fart?
Of course. You have to learn a lot about anatomy, my friend. And about asking silly questions.

I’d like to tag Alice and The B (you can do it as if you were a woman :P) to do this. 😀 Anyone else is welcome to do it too!